Notes From The Heart Global Village Binfen Feedback
 Magazine
              Editorial Group:


              Florence Chen
              Joshan Yao
              Kevin Kuai
              Lily Tan

 
 
 Notes From The Heart
 
What I See is More Beautiful
by Philip Tan
Translate by Florence Chen

It is said that with this rare disease, people slowly lose their sight.

It's a cancer of the brain, disabling the optical nerves. Last year only two thousand contracted this disease globally, and on the average would live no more than three years. Stimulated by the tumor in the brain, patients tend to be smarter than average.

Roughly thirty years ago, David came back from Vietnam. The brutality of the war caused Americans to lose faith and also changed David's life.

"Maybe I shouldn't have chosen the military. Maybe I should have spent more time with my family," thought David.

Tumbling through the job market, David finally found work that kept him afloat. Several years went by and life grew stable for David. He had two lovely sons, the older one David, Jr. and the younger one Steven. David and his wife saved and saved. Money didn't represent happiness, but it meant assurance for the boys' future.

Just when things got better, brain cancer struck Steven.

At the age of four, he became a regular visitor to the hospital. Their modest income couldn't keep up with the heavy burden. Though Steven was fragile, his parents didn't want him hospitalized.
They didn't know if tomorrow they could still hold Steven in their arms, or if there would only be Steven's memory to embrace.

"We want to spend every moment with Steven to love him, until God takes him back. Without hospitalization, insurance company would not pay for his expenses, but we've never felt more deeply that money cannot buy time, and we need time to be with Steven to love him."

Steven was a bright child, always bringing immense joy to people. Dimming eyes couldn't stop him from slipping out for his adventures.

Perhaps his refusal to admit defeat gave him a strong sense of existence.

From the day Steven learned to read, he took such pleasure in reading. For everything new, he had a hundred times more energy & curiosity than the other kids. This little person seemed to understand the true meaning of life, however short it might be. Never willing to lay still, to wait mindlessly, to let life slip through his fingers in vain,

Steven played games with Death, betting that he would not give up and stay alive meaninglessly.
If life is a matter of luck, if life is a journey, no matter how bad the luck and no matter how brief the journey, life is never worthless.

"Perhaps my life holds different challenges, but I can live just as richly as others," said Steven.

At six, Steven insisted on attending a regular school. He fought to go to school, and fought to be treated equally.

"I might die, but I'm not dead yet. You have no right to take away how I want to live."

The first IQ test, Steven scored 180. To him, learning is living.

More than ordinary kids, Steven treasured life and understood fate. He was mature, determined, & his life was exciting. One couldn't help but love Steven, for he taught us how to live with meaning.

At seven, the left eye went blind.

Living with a very weak right eye made everything much harder for Steven, but he surprised people with his perseverance & strength. He pressed down on the enlarged optical nerves to peer at the world through the corner of his eye. The weaker he got, the more optimistic Steven became.

"This couldn't be better," said he, always encouraging himself, & never finding a reason to give up.

Steven's parents never took him out at night. On the way home one special night, Steven exclaimed in awe, "What's that? So beautiful!"

"Baby, it's the moon."
"So beautiful!"
"Who hasn't seen the moon?" said David, Jr. doubtfully.
"Oh, yeah? You have seen the moon?" Steven shot back.
"Of course"
"But what I see is more beautiful."

Yes, no one saw beauty more than you did. Because you saw the moon, and this world, with your life. What you saw was more beautiful than anything anyone could see. How I wish I could see the world through your eyes, and you could touch the world with your life.

2010/9/30
[Back]
 

 

Notes From The Heart Global Village Binfen Feedback

© 2010 心音杂志版权所有. All rights reserved.